Wednesday, November 8, 2017

Principles behind the 12 steps

An interesting way to look at the 12 steps from SoberRecovery:
  1. Honesty — The operative principle behind step one is honesty. If you cannot get honest about the scope of your problem, and honest about a sincere effort to resolve it, you will not succeed in your recovery. How about a definition of honesty as "the absence of the intention to deceive"? Why do we try to fool ourselves and others? 
  2. Hope — In order to engage in a course of addiction recovery, we must have hope of success. If there is no hope, why try? Perhaps you have failed on our own, so how about enlisting some help? A way to find hope is to realize that recovery is not a question of your ability. After all, there are millions in recovery. Your hope of recovery is not through ability, but through persistence and application. 
  3. Faith — This step represents a stage of action where you begin to employ the recovery skills being learned. You can seek out help with the skills, but it is also necessary to utilize them on your own. Your job is to become willing to do the right thing. A simple way to view the 'next right thing' is to not engage in your old behavior. Have faith that your recovery will work. 
  4. Courage — This step is really about having courage to honestly (see step 1) look at yourself. Take a look at how your perspective has become warped to justify your continued behavior. You are in a recovery program to take an honest assessment of yourself. This is about having the courage to do that. 
  5. Integrity — If you have truly done a thorough job of introspection and evaluation of your assets and shortcomings do you have the integrity to own up to them? It can be very difficult to be open and honest about your past behaviors and mistakes. You must accept them, and accept the need for a dose of humility. 
  6. Willingness — Now that we have accomplished an inventory of the good and no so good aspects of our character and behavior, are we willing to change them? All of them? The important part in this 12 step principle is the willingness to let go of old behaviors. 
  7. Humility — Here we move further into action. In step six you become willing to let go of your old behaviors. Now you ask for help in actually letting go. Can you learn to forgive yourself? 
  8. Discipline and Action — We are continuing to remove the barriers that can block forward sober growth. We are getting ready to sweep our side of the street clean. Make a list of all those people you have harmed both through actions and not being present or living up to obligations. 
  9. Forgiveness — Asking for the forgiveness of those we have intentionally or unintentionally injured is the order of the day with this step. This is where you take action regarding the list you made in step eight. A key point here is to try to correct those injuries through action, not just words. It is highly recommended that you get guidance and help with this step. Asking forgiveness is not a gift to the other person, but rather an act of kindness to you. 
  10. Acceptance — To be human is to make mistakes. Hopefully our journey has led us to the point where we can readily admit mistakes and accept ourselves for being imperfect. We must also learn not to judge others but accept them for who they are, not our vision of who they should be. 
  11. Knowledge and Awareness — Here we search for our path and try to become aware of our purpose in life, and actively pursue that purpose. I view this principle as just being aware, and not being caught up in the rush of life. This step is about making a conscious effort to do the right thing and to be at peace. 
  12. Service and Gratitude — Having brought about a behavior and attitude change sufficient to remain in recovery; you are empowered to demonstrate the new principles by which we live in our daily life through example. At this stage in a 12-step program, you seek out and are available to help others in need.

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